Let's all go to the lobby, Let's all go to the lobby...

Ask any kid which they would rather do, go to a movie or go to a dental check up, and it's a no brainer. Well...


The other morning at breakfast.


"Jacob, your sister is going to the dentist this morning," I say trying to slowly work the conversation in the right direction.

"She is?"

"Yes, and you have a dental appointment on Saturday, " I say in a cheery tone.

"I'm not going," I hear between bites of banana. "I don't want to go to the dentist."

"Well, you can pick. You can either go to the dentist, or we can all go to a movie at the movie theater," still in my overly cheery voice.

"Hmm....that's a tough decision. I'll have to think about it," Jacob tells me and continues eating his breakfast.


There was no sarcasm in that reply, by the way. Jacob doesn't understand sarcasm and certainly can't use it in everyday conversations properly. He honestly couldn't decide. I know to most of you that is hard to imagine. A trip to the dentist or going to a movie? No question needed to be asked! But it must give you some idea of how scary a movie theater can be for my son, because let me tell you, his dental appointments are no walk in the park.

For most everyone an afternoon of going to the movies as a family is a lot of fun. For Jacob it is terrifying. It's loud, dark, and crowded with lots of unfamiliar people. Plus there is the huge screen that you have no idea what is going to pop up on it. We've tried taking Jacob to movies before with little luck even with his pockets stuffed with candy, a tub of popcorn in his lap, and a drink the size of his head, he still has little desire to go.

Like I have said before, Jacob is not a big movie guy. So when the movie "Oceans" came out two years ago when Jacob was four, I decided to take him. I had thought maybe it was just the choice of movies prior, and with his love for animals this would surely hold his attention. It was just the two of us, for a much needed mommy/son day right after the birth of my baby girl. We found our seats and settled in with our snacks and drinks. The previews went on and on and Jacob was getting antsy. We had come prepared with ear plugs already in his ears, so I figured the noise wouldn't be a problem. And that's when the giant whale soared high above the ocean coming down with a huge splash to start the movie, and Jacob screamed and screamed in sheer terror! I quickly gathered up our belongings knowing that there was no salvaging this bonding moment. Coats, purse, even Jacob's shoes on the ground as he yelled "Oh no!" over and over again as the whale continued it's journey. Now how to get him out with all our stuff and me being four weeks postpartum. Not an easy task, but somehow we managed to get out and I reassured Jacob all would be fine. Since we had only managed to see five minutes of the movie, I stopped at guest services to see if it would be possible to get a refund once I explained the situation.

I waited patiently behind the woman in front of me who was standing there with her own daughter who was probably about six. This woman was livid. As I listened to her rant on and on about children acting inappropriately at movies and demanding her money back, I realized she was talking about Jacob. As the customer service girl went through the proper procedures to issue the refund, the woman kept on going with her ignorant verbal outburst about Jacob. She was so upset that she started crying because her day with her daughter had been ruined by some "selfish brat". Oh yes, those were her words. I looked down at my sweet son who was quietly humming with his orange ear plugs sticking out of his ears, and tears started flowing down my face. I couldn't take it any more. I tapped her on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, but you are talking about my son." She paused in her tirade, and looked at me and then down at Jacob who was unaware of anything going on. And what did she do? Turned and walked away. I was crying hard at that point and the customer service girl didn't even ask and just started issuing my refund.

So we've tried. Some would say is it worth the fight? No, and for the most part we haven't attempted movies in a long time. But there is an incredible thing we have recently learned about. Sensory Friendly Films! That's right, a movie experience without all the chaos and confusion. Lights are turned up, volume is turned down, it's ok to talk and move around. You can even bring your own snacks! There are even no lengthy previews to sit through. But the best part for me is the company you are with. I can relax, Jacob can be himself, and I don't have to worry about anyone's reaction to my son.

It just so happens that the dental appointment I made for Jacob six months ago falls this Saturday morning, the same morning that our local theater is having a sensory friendly films version of "The Lorax". Sensory Friendly Films only happen once a month, and not always are they a good choice for Jacob.

So why the push to go to a movie? Three reasons. The first, it gives Jacob a "social edge" if you will. If he is familiar with whatever current movie is out there, it makes him part of the group. I've been around kids enough to know that the current cool movie makes a big impression and they definitely talk about it. McDonald's has known this for years! It makes me shutter to think of all those plastic and sometimes strange toys from each and every kid movie that has been discarded and now filling up our landfills. But enough on that. Second reason. It is a perfect family opportunity. I admit I want to be able to experience a movie with my son. And when my daughter is old enough, I would like us to go to the movies together. And the third and final reason. I just want him to get used to it. If he never were to go to a movie and went for the first time as an adult, it would be incredibly overwhelming. The more Jacob goes, the more he learns what to expect and it becomes easier.

It's Thursday and Jacob has yet to decide about the movie. I won't push it, but leave it up to him so he feels he is in control of the situation. I'll ask one more time and see which is the lesser of the  two fears, the dentist or the movie theater.