There's been a lot of ghost talk at our house lately. I'm sure it stems from the plethora of Halloween decorations littering the stores for the last month. Or it could be the "Franklin's Halloween" video the baby girl picked from the library the other day, only to be terrified of it. She quickly learned she did not like ghosts! But Jacob on the other hand has taken a new interest.
The other night while laying in bed, Jacob announced he wanted to make a haunted house at our house. My husband jumping at the chance to discuss something other than baseball or animals, and laid in bed with Jacob for close to an hour filling him in on the haunted houses he created as a child. Jacob couldn't get enough. Finally after 10:00, the haunted house talk ended, and thankfully after all the ghost talk Jacob fell fast asleep.
I figured it was a one time event, but sure enough the next morning, Jacob was raring to go with all kinds of ideas on making a haunted house.
"...and Mommy, you could be a ghost, too. You would make a great ghost!" he told me in between bites of oatmeal at breakfast.
"I scared of ghosts," the baby girl said unbeknownst to me that she was even listening.
"It will be soooo cool," Jacob went on, "We'll invite everyone to our haunted house!"
"I scared of ghosts," again the baby girl chimed in.
"Jacob, just eat your breakfast," I said. "We have plenty of time to figure it all out."
Take what happened at our church nursery just two nights before. I was working a night shift and had both Jacob and the baby girl with me. There were other kids Jacob's age there, and they were all playing hide and go seek outside. I was sitting there watching the smaller kids play, when all of a sudden I heard that familiar wailing sound.
"Ahhhhhhhhh!" I heard from under the slide.
Instantly I knew it was Jacob. It is the exaggerated sound he makes when slightly hurt but wanting attention. Ignoring it is not an option, as he will just get louder and draw even more unwanted looks his way. At home, it is easy to ignore. But here, I didn't want his peers to see him have a moment, so I stepped to the slide to investigate.
"Ahhhhhhhh!"
"Jacob, what's wrong?" I asked.
"He scared me!" Jacob replied.
Turns out that one of the kids jumped out and yelled "Boo!" in Jacob's face. It caught Jacob by surprise, and he screamed.
And here he was just a few days later thinking he was all brave to have a haunted house. Yeah, right!
I thought I would just let it ride and see where it went. Sure enough right after school, Jacob had more haunted house and ghost talk. My husband's idea was to maybe find a video of a haunted house someone had created and share that with Jacob to give him a better idea of what he would be in for.
So as my husband sat on the couch searching for just the right youtube video of a haunted house, Jacob anxiously sat at the end waiting to view. Just as my husband thought he had found a winner, Jacob bursts out, "Turn it off! It's too loud!" as he covered his ears.
"Jacob," my husband said, "I told you that haunted houses are loud. Remember?" as he switched off the video.
"I have an idea. I'll just wear my headphones!" Jacob announced.
"hmmmm...I'm not sure I have ever seen a ghost wearing headphones before," my husband replied.
This made me chuckle. I could so picture Jacob wearing his big red noise-cancelling headphones atop his head that was covered by a white sheet. Not sure how scary that will be for the new neighbor kids.
Later that night, we were all outside with the kids playing. I noticed Jacob was missing, and I opened the front door to our house. "Jacob, are you in here?" I yelled.
"Welcome to my haunted house!" he said as he popped out from behind the door.
All the lights were turned off and the blinds closed. It was somewhat dark, but as the day gave way to night outside, there was still enough light filtering in to show the toys scattered across the living room floor and the dinner dishes still stacked on the kitchen counter.
As he stepped outside with plans of rounding up the neighbor kids to take a tour through the "haunted house", I somehow convinced him that we should save it for closer to Halloween. He's having enough trouble fitting in with the new neighbor kids, I don't need them laughing at a haunted house they feel is babyish.
It's times like these that I realize how very immature Jacob is compared to his peers. In his mind, entering our dark house is terrifying. Just the other day one of our new neighbor boys made reference to hurrying home to watch "Nightmare on Elm Street" for the first time with his dad. We are no where near that, nor do I want to be as I don't like that thing myself. But as Jacob's peers mature, it becomes more and more evident how developmentally and behaviorally he is behind.
In fact, last night while at our Aspergers support group, they gave us the statistic that children on the spectrum are typically at a developmental age of 2/3 of their actual age. So with Jacob being 7, his developmental and behavioral age is closer to 4 1/2 years old! That explains a lot! And I would say that is right on. But that doesn't make it easier, especially when academically he is beyond his actual age, but his maturity level is close to 3 years younger.
As we were walking in to the support group last night, Jacob needed to use the restroom. He pushed open the door, and instantly I heard the familiar "Ahhhhhhh" sound. The lights were off and it was completely black in the restroom, and Jacob was scared.
I'm thrilled that Jacob is branching out and wanting to try something new that is a little scary, but I'm thinking the haunted house may have to wait a year or two. Although a headphone wearing ghost could be quite comical! But for now I'll tuck Jacob's headphones away in his drawer, and hope that the ghost talk subsides on it's own.
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